Being a people-person is by being conversant with the people skills required.
All of life’s successes are a result of a good relationship with others.
Having talents but without people skills will hinder one from maximizing his or her full potentials. You may not have been born with relational skills but you can acquire those skills.
Some of them are highlighted here. Even if you are not the extroverted type, you can learn it.
They are just simple people skills that will make your life much more rewarding and fulfilling.
Here’s the continuation of How to get any one interested in you.
The most sincere form of flattery you can give to a human being is your listening ability. I mean undivided, uninterrupted, emphatic kind of listening.
Encouraging others to talk about themselves. Have you noticed that people don’t really want advice?
They just want a listening ear. If you have little children, you should understand the power of effectively listening to your kids.
Do you see how happy they get around you and become more outspoken and free to express their deepest feelings?
If you can effectively listen to children less than 4 years of age, you can listen to almost anybody.
Deep listeners are usually popular with people because they are more relatable to others.
To be a people-person you have to listen will all intensity, skill and timing. I know it’s easier to listen to a person than a crowd.
How then can we do this in a group? Simple. You give the same equal intensity to every one as you would give one person in your group.
Listening is an art of which if practiced frequently, the better one gets good at it.
It’s usually a great deal of effort for most of us that are the outspoken type to hold our thought, listen without interrupting.
But if you want to be a people-person, you have to overcome the temptation of interrupting others when they are still talking.
You have to let them simmer down and have their thoughts expressed fully before you respond.
Read more on: How to listen effectively and be loved for it!
Let the best idea win.
Assume for instance, you are in an executive meeting and you are just done introducing the strategies on how you and your team are going to overcome the numerous problems your company has been going through in the past months.
Then, all of a sudden, someone outside your team punched a hole on your team’s strategy and later came up with an idea that seemed to go on well with others.
And your teams idea no longer was that good enough. How do you handle this circumstance?
Do you just accept the change or insist that your team will continue on the strategy initiated?
This is where people skill have to be applied here.
As a leader or would be leader it feels natural to want the idea you bring hold sway but if you want to be a people-person, you have to let go your idea for a better idea in your group sometimes.
Winning with others should matter to you than winning alone.The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
Success achieved through team participation is much more rewarding than success achieved alone.
Being a persuasive talker doesn’t mean that you would always win an idea.
If you want to be a people-person, your goal should be letting the best idea win.
What is the best idea? The best idea is the popular idea, the idea that majority of your group votes for.
When you do this you make others see you as truly a people-person, one that really cares about the thoughts and feelings of others.
With these, you can improve your range of influence and be the kind of person everyone loves.
Remember, that people are always interested in themselves. Use this knowledge and influence others.
Never say ‘you are wrong‘.
We all look but we see differently. How often do we feel down casted when someone says ‘you are wrong’?
Every fibre of our being always want to fight that premise.
Even if that was true, self-defence is usually the case. No one wants to be told he or she is wrong.
How do you tell someone he or she is wrong? It’s all in how you approach it. Start in a very diplomatic way.
See the persons positives first and express it and point out the persons shortcomings indirectly.
Don’t argue. You opinion must not always count. Learn to see things from others perspective.
Accept that the person has a great point.
People have their own beliefs, value systems and lifestyles.
And usually they feel right in their own eyes. Acknowledge that fact. Then find areas you both agree on and dwell on it.
Don’t be tempted to say ‘you are wrong’. Each person has something to teach us. I don’t mean that every body we meet will teach us something. What I mean is that they have the potential to do so.
Finally, Instead of saying ‘you are wrong’, ask questions. One of the ways I correct someone whom I perceive is wrong is I ask questions.
Simple right? And when I ask questions, I don’t expect an answer.
The questions were just a statement for the other person to ponder on. He or she may defend the question but will be glad
I never made the foolery out of him or her.
Agreeing with someone doesn’t mean they were always right but that you are sensitive enough to value your relationships above your opinions.
Is that hard? If you really want to be a people-person, you shouldn’t tell someone he or she is wrong.
Read previously on : How To Improve Your People Skills (pt1)