Infatuation is an emotional attachment to, craze for, mania for another person which is usually intense but short-lived.
It is an intense fire that doesn’t last for long.
You feel this sense of urgency, wanting everything now. You make rash decisions.
You think you are in love but you aren’t. Sad.
Another word for infatuation is a strong addiction to someone or unreasoning love.
While true love is a deep affection that lasts.
It’s sacrificial, committed, loving, slow and not thinking of loosing the significant other.
Most intense feeling or attachment to someone within a few days is not true love.
You may think you already have the information you need about a person, but you may not really know true things.
True love is the informed knowledge and acceptance of a person’s natural weaknesses and flaws.
Also, true love starts as an emotional attachment to someone it doesn’t expect any thing in return.
How do you tell if that relationship is true love or infatuation?
Why should you fall in love this minute and fall out of love the next?
Why does someone whom you first thought you loved now become a stranger?
What went wrong?
How do you measure someone’s love tank?
You don’t really know him that much but you are both passionate and crazy about each other, could this be love?
Sometimes, it make take a lot of unpalatable experiences before you know how love feels.
In this article, I have compiled 10 differences between love and infatuation here.
INFATUATION OR LOVE?
1. Infatuation desires to possess the other person.
For instance, it’s infatuation if they didn’t whatsapp you when you expected it and you feel bad about it thinking something must have gone wrong.
Or If they don’t smile at you when you want it, you think something should be wrong.
While true love releases the significant other.
That is to say it’s not controlling or domineering.
“I don’t care if you are busy, you MUST see me tonight!” is the voice of infatuation.
“When you are free, would you be able to see me tonight?” is the voice of love.
This is to say true love gives the significant other the opportunity to make a choice, while infatuation is the only active decider.
2. Infatuation is like a time bomb. it is sometimes described as love at first time, some also call it “crush”.
In Infatuation, you want everything now.
You want them to commit to the relationship now.
You are having this feeling that you don’t have much time to waste.
It’s so intense that it may explode but true love is like a spark though it could start as an inferno but it’s enduring and permanent which may or may not find attractions at first but it usually builds up and stays.
3. Infatuation grows very fast like weeds because they see the object of their desire as what they want to see and not what they truly are.
That is to say they have an exaggerated sense of the object of desire but it dies because of lack of depth.
For instance, because she smiled to you on the first night you met her and she gave you so much attention. You felt she should be the ideal kind of person you have always dreamed of.
True love on the other sees their object of desire as they truly are.
It starts as a spark and grows steadily. It has a much deeper foundation.
4. Unreasoning love or infatuation is a selfish desire of a person. It only cares about it gratification.
Infatuation keep looking at what it stands to benefit or gain.
You see yourself married, having kids.
You look at the relationship mostly from your own point of view.
But love that is true is a mutual bliss share by two people. They both give to each other.
Also, love is selfless, it doesn’t think of its own alone but also the significant other.
5. Infatuation is a strong and intense attraction that can also be called LUST. It usually an attraction to a person based on what was first noticed and not what was truly known.
This unreasonable attraction accepts the significant on the face value but true love is skin deep.
In Infatuation, you project wrongly a lot about the person.
It’s when you put forward your beliefs, ideas and convictions about a person before you know them in a positive light.
In your heart, you are predicting what you think they should be.
True love is based on knowledge of the person.
The foundation of love is Knowledge.
Informed knowledge is key to determine if your love is true or not.
This knowledge should be practical experiences you have shared with them.
And the moment infatuation (strong attraction and passion) accepts the significant other for who they are, Love is birthed.
Infatuation or attraction may lead to a wedding but love is revealed after the wedding from the honeymoon and during the marriage.
6. Infatuation wants or think the person to be perfect with little or no flaws.
It’s infatuation if you want everything to go always smoothly, no mistakes, you want to always feel happy with the person all the time.
And if things go wrong, you put up an attitude,you become rude, revengeful, unforgiven, malicious and you criticize.
If you do this, you are not seeing them the way they truly are but the way you think they should be.
But true love on the other hand is constructive.
It doesn’t wait for the significant other to return love and it knows the flaws of the person and accept it that way.
7. Infatuation is usually an emotional phenomenon – you see the person and you are hooked.
You are attracted to things that have no depth like her nails, the way she talks, her legs, her dress sense. etc.
If your love isn’t based on their dress sense or how they laugh… It’s true love.
True love connects to the depth of someone, how they feel, their aspirations, beliefs and what matters to them.
True love is usually a devotion, spiritual phenomenon – connection of two souls.
8. Infatuation is demanding, selfish, addictive, gut-wrenching which has an active actor—the infatuated person.
True love gives you energy, while infatuation takes energy away from you.
If when you are together with someone and all you feel is being drained especially mentally, it’s infatuation.
If you find it difficult to share moments of silence together without feeling awkward, it could be infatuation.
The other person is usually passive and may not be aware.
9. Infatuation doubts, distrust and is uncertain about the significant other but love that is true believes the other person and is safe and secure.
If you always feel very jealous, fearful, anxious and worried about the other person, it could be infatuation.
True love is a peaceful connection you have with someone.
10. Infatuation has high level of sexual excitement. It’s sudden and passionate. It is found in the lustful desires of man.
You feel the thrills, the aahs and chemistry running all over your body but for true love, it starts on a mental point of view first before sexual excitement.
love that is true takes time to build up any sexual excitement. It’s slow but it will get to what it desires.
Like a flower, if it was infatuation, you will be plucked, if it was true love, you will be watered.
Infatuation can grow into love.
Infatuation —that passionate and intense desire sometimes is the beginning of finding true and lasting love yet it’s not LOVE.
High school Teens and sometimes adults may have experienced it.
This intense desire is usually mistaken as love by the infatuated because it looks very real but it’s just ‘puppy love’
But then, it CAN becomes TRUE LOVE when sufficient KNOWLEDGE of the significant other has been gotten and accepted.
One acid test to know the difference between love and infatuation is that if the passion and emotional attachment you once felt for someone is suddenly gone… It wasn’t actually love.
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